Monday, July 27, 2009
Uncovered Sex Tape Reveals Martin County Judge Stewart R. Hershey Giving a "Dirty Elvis" To Reptilian Swingers
A sex tape uncovered in Michael Jackson's personal belongs starring the right honorable Judge Stewart R. Hershey of the Nineteenth Judicial Court of Florida in Martin County Florida has been the most downloaded video of the week. The Illuminati, under the guise of the Federal Bureau of Investigations has since effectively blacked out all websites with links to the film. Fortunately, everyone at the Wingnut has seen the film at least twice and can describe the Judge's scenes with great accuracy.
According to staff writer Phebor Timtom, "the opening scene on the tape is of a party of reptilian shape shifters cavorting, dew-lapping, changing skin shades, and praising Obama's health care plan. Then something happens off screen and all the lizards start dewlapping like crazy and that's when Judge Hershey steps in scene in an Elvis suit. I didn't think the judge had it in him but he just starts giving all these lizards a "dirty elvis". I mean, this Judge Hershey is a real pro."
Senior Editor Jolene Crobstob was less impressed with the Judges actions. "The entire time the Judge is being used by the lizard people he just keeps singing "hound dog" by Elvis. The whole scenario is demeaning to human life on this planet. Judge Hershey should be ashamed.